I spent so much of my life hiding away. My aspirations were always kept to myself. My thoughts would remain locked in this hollow cranium. I always had the desire to do the right thing in any situation I encountered, even if that made enemies out of old friends. I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t. Regrets, I’ve had a few.
Doing the right thing meant that I had to lie sometimes in order to make it happen. While I was young and foolish when I’d do this, I’d often find myself digging an even deeper hole where these white lies would turn vile the further I’d dig. I’d learn one of the most valuable lessons in life. To live in the open.
What do I mean by this? I mean to live your life like you have nothing to hide. To not hide anything from other people when they ask. To not boast about bad things if you aren’t asked about them. To be willing to engage in an open and honest dialog. To consider different points of view and free yourself from prejudice and bias.
This was freeing. My spirit of inquiry would be boundless. The desire to learn would become the fuel to my fire. Each new day to gain a deeper understanding of the world around me was invigorating.
When I became a parent and my kids would start to tell these white lies, I could see what is transpiring there. The desire to do what is right, found with this natural tendency to get caught up in the secrecy. For what reason though? I have no answer.
The problem with lies or secrets is that they cannot manifest into the world. For a lie is a secret with yourself, and a secret is something confined to a prison. If you speak in truths in the moment however, you have nothing to conceal. Lies will always catch up with you in the future.
I know right where I went wrong. To not be living in the open.